Living in Dreams

For those who know me you know I am a dreamer. Not just dreaming of the future when I’m awake, but like clockwork every night when I go to sleep I start dreaming all night long. It feels at times like living in two realities. The real one when I’m awake, and the one in my dreams. Yes, it does get kind of confusing sometimes, but I’m really not crazy. Least not that crazy. Ok, I’m a little crazy, but my dreams aren’t always like living in a horror movie or psycho like (only sometimes). I kid, most of my dreams tend to be based on a grounded reality. Related to things that I am dealing with in a normal life, and hoping for in my future.

As of late my dreams have been very pleasant. So pleasant in fact that real life has been feeling like a drag, and all I’ve wanted to do is go back to sleep so I can live in my second reality. It’s been a struggle every morning dragging myself out of bed. I’m the first to admit the challenge of life, the challenge of just getting up in the morning, but this has been a different ordeal. I’m not really tired. I’m just under so much pressure, and I’d rather just live in my alternate reality of pleasant dreams, but I have pressed on. “Dragged on” might be a better way to phrase it. It feels like the weight of the world on my shoulders when my hopes and dreams seem so far away, but let me tell you about the week I’ve had. I’ve been put in on average 15 hours a day this week. Between work, workouts, and my own projects its a lot. I was ready for the week to be over on Tuesday. I had people coming down on me about my work when I’m doing the best job I can. And I had (still have) so much work to be done. This was not the week to want to be a lazy quitter.

This week I taught a demo for BodyCombat on top of my regular teaching schedule, plus subbing extra classes. Then I’ve done 4 video shoots (2 more to go) for work. Between shooting interviews and getting awesome shots I also participate in the Firefighter Stairclimb charity event at our gym, which I got to help put together and produce video for (video is below if you want to check that out). And next week I’m going on a work trip (ok, maybe it’s only 5 hours away, but still something really cool about being sent out of town for work). It’s like you know you made it somewhere when your job has you traveling on business trips.

It’s amazing what my life has become. To think a few years ago I was going to college still with no clue what I would be when I grew up, and now I’ve decided not to ever grow up, but right now just enjoy the crazy, and learn everything I can in a chaotic awesome job. I’ve always wanted to be a writer, and creative mind. I wanted to make movies since I was in 7th grade when my friends and I attempted to make our first movie (notice the word “attempted”). Now 12 years later I am getting paid to producing video content. This is truly a dream come true. Beyond the video I am also learning so many valuable skills. A year ago I was still working at Pizza Hut, and I thought being a delivery drive was tough. And it was a lot of work, and I did what I always do by giving it everything I got. I had no idea working full time and dealing with people how tough work can be, but it is so worth it now.

While on occasion I am ready to throw in the towel, and just call it all off, I’m not gonna. If I walked away from this opportunity it would be the dumbest move of my life, because I have been called by God to do great things, and right now I know I’m exactly where I belong. Even when things get tough. No, especially when things get tough it teaches me how to endure, and how to take initiative. How to grow. I am amazed by what God is doing in my life, and how he’s transforming me. The who and the how I live is what he’s repurposing, and he’s showing me how to be a great man. A man of passion, discipline, challenge, and drive. Never giving up, but accepting the areas where I am weak, and learning to grow in them.

Like in the Stairclimb event I didn’t give up. I may not have beaten the firefighter’s time (those guys are amazing btw), but I did go the distance. Not just because I’m a fitness instructor did I feel obligated to go the full distance. I can’t quit because I am glorifying God, and who he’s made, and making me to be. It’s the accomplishment that makes me feel strong, but its proof of what God has allowed me to do, and the strength he gives me. So as I woke up this morning I am not feeling like going back to sleep, and back to my dream reality, but I feel like making my reality how I dream it to be. Changing myself, and changing the world. Call me crazy, but I believe the world can change, and I know I am meant to be part of changing it.

Here’s God open a new chapter in my life. I can’t wait to see what will happen next!



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